I Finally Stink!!

May 21, 2009

When I picked daughter up from school today she said the greatest thing in the world happened to her today.

Then she shoved her finger in my face and said, “Smell this mom!”

She was so excited; grinning from ear to ear.

I have a five year old BOY so I have learned a strong lesson about smelling things randomly offered to my nose.  No matter how cute and delicate she is, I politely refused.

“Please mom!  Just smell it!  It’s important!”

So I take a little sniff only to find that I don’t smell anything except the ordinary smell an elementary school aged child holds after a long day with other stinky kids and a cafeteria and a gymnasium and a playground. 

Don’t make that face — you know the smell.

She finally lets me in on the secret that she finally stinks and is therefore ready to wear deodorant!   I haven’t seen her happier in weeks!

“Honey, it smells fine.  I’m very sorry to say this but baby you don’t stink yet.”

She informed me that I was wrooooonnnnngggg!  BUT! She knew that I would try to ruin her life so she had safeguards in place because see she first let her BFF smell her finger (that had been in her pit) and she confirmed the stench.

She knew that wouldn’t be enough for me so she then took the finger with the alledged smell to her ‘almost’ bff, a.k.a. ‘bff in training’ and this girl too confirmed it was not a pretty smell.

If I don’t believe her I can just, ‘call her friends’.  They will tell me the truth.

“But daughter, why do I need to call them when I can clearly see you smell only like clean laundry?”

Tears.  Pain.  Agony.

“Mom,” sniffle sniffle sob sob “I really don’t need your sarcasm right now.  Please.  This is hard enough without you making jokes.”  cry cry cry cry  “Can’t you see I’m becoming a woman?  It’s a trying time for me.”

WHAT????????  WHAT THE HAY??????????  WHO?  THE WAHT?DKJS:LK*#&%^% $#$)(^*#$



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