How Much Longer?

January 6, 2008

It’s time to leave for church so I don’t have very long to share my thoughts with you. I was just sitting here reflecting on last Sunday’s service and how difficult it was for me not to break out into tears. Through most of the service I had to choke them back because I didn’t want anyone to see me cry. Despite what you may think, I’m not usually a crier unless I am 4-12 weeks pregnant. I can assure you I am NOT pregnant.

As they offered an alter call, the grandfather of a girl my daughter’s age made it up to the alter to pray, I was very sad. His father is ill. Maybe that’s why he was praying. But then when his granddaughter silently walked up to join him, I practically burst into tears. I’m tearing up now just thinking about it. She gently kneeled down at the alter beside him, placing her hand on his back. She softly whispered something in his ear and then bowed her head in prayer with him.

I watched a grown man break in front of the whole congregation. This grown man is not the type of man you’d expect to see broken. But he broke in front of his 6 year old granddaughter, praying with him. She remained his strength — gently rubbing his back with her hand as they continued to pray.

It wasn’t long before I had to excuse myself to the restroom to bawl like a biddy baby.

When I returned, they were just getting up to head back to their seats. He was in front, leading her. Her face was dry, no tears. She was calm and reserved. She seemed very serious and not like a child.

As he turned in to his aisle and sat down, she kept walking towards the back of the church. She made it to the last pew before I noticed a single tear falling from her cheek. She too was choking them back.

I watched her head towards the restroom, likely to release the rest of her sadness.

All I could think is, “How Much Longer?”

I’m slipping.

We are slipping.

You know. You were there with us. You are here with us.

“How Much Longer?”

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One Response to “How Much Longer?”

  1. tina Says:

    tina this say

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